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About Me Member Procrastinator ForgottenSoul0719/Female/United States Recent Activity Deviant for 4 Years
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incomprehensible

Thu Mar 12, 2009, 12:19 PM
I feel alone. I think I feel alone more so than ever. Im surronded by people, but I am alone. I feel like no one understands me, I feel like no one tries too. But more than anything, I feel no one cares. I dont know why I feel this way, im as happy as ive ever been, at the same time im not. Booze makes me feel alive, and booze makes me feel dead. It makes me feel powerful, and it makes me feel weak. I hate to love it, and love to hate it. booze makes me feel like me. The only thing...that ever has. Thus, the downfall begins.



I feel like im addicted. I feel like I have to have it. When I wake up, I think about it. When I go to sleep, I think about it. It is always on my mind. It loves me and I love it. It makes me think deeper than I have ever thought before. It made me remember things I forgot years ago, things I didn't want to remember, things I can't remember. It has made me realize more than I ever wanted to, more than one should ever realize. But those memories were covered up, with a certain okayness until sobriety struck again.


When I first started drinking, I drank to forget. I drank to forget nicole. I drank because I felt if I didn't my friends at the time wouldn't be my friends. Then everything escaladed. The booze became my friend. The booze became more important than anything, even more important than kayla, who often tried to take it from me. She can't take it, its mine and she CAN NOT have it. Why is this so hard for her to understand?


The booze brought me to some low points, and also the highest points ive ever had. It isnt as much of a problem as the words make it out to be, or perhaps im just good at hiding things. I still get good grades, I can keep a job, i still have my girl friend, I still have my friends. They became more important than the booze.... it hasnt been as much as a problem as it once was....


Thats just controlled addiction my friends... controlled addiction


It will always be me, and I will always be it.

I love you booze.

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Devious Info

  • Current Residence: In my head...
  • Interests: Computers...
  • Favourite movie: Harry potter series
  • Favourite band or musician: Story of the year
  • Favourite genre of music: Emo/Rock
  • Favourite artist: peanut! <3
  • Favourite poet or writer: me bishes >=| and JK Rowling
  • Favourite photographer: ME! =D
  • Operating System: Xp Pro
  • MP3 player of choice: I-pod
  • Favourite game: Mario..o.0
  • Favourite gaming platform: PS2 and Nintendo D.S.
  • Favourite cartoon character: umm well i likw disney movies...
  • Personal Quote: "Don't worry about the world coming to an end today. It's already tomorrow in Austral
  • Tools of the Trade: my brilliant mind

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didn't think you still went to this site...lol

thanks for the watch and provin me wrong
~Zelden26 Apr 25, 2007, 11:53:27 AM Hide
most people aren't sure of what they really want in life. I received this letter
from a friend on the computer, did what it told me to, and within a week,
everything I had wished came true!! Here's an exact copy,

this

really

works!!!!



*************************************************************




1. To yourself, say the name of the only guy or girl you wanna be with 3 times!




*************************************************************




2. Think of something you wanna accomplish within the next week and say it to
your self 6 times!!




~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~



3. If you had 1 wish what would it be? say it to yourself 9 times!!!



-----------------------------------------------------------------------



4. Think of something that you want to happen between you and that 1special
person and say it to your self 12 times!!!


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5. Now, heres the hard part! Pick only 1 of these wishes and as you scroll down
focus and concentrate on it and think on nothing else but that wish.


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Now make one last & final wish about that one wish that you picked.


After reading this, you have 1 hour to send it out to 15 people, and what you
wished for will come true within in one week!


u only get one chance!!!!! Now scroll down and think of your
crush!!















Keep going

down
















Keep going


















Keep

going













!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!




Did you think of your crush? I hope so, that was your last chance. Now pay very
close attention to this important message!



Sorry but once read, must be sent. Yes, this is one of those kinda chain letters
that everyone hates. This one has been going since 1864 and if you break this
chain, you will pay!!!!!! Remember that after hearing these stories.


First Example:

Take Barbra Wallace.. She was a pretty lucky girl, up till she got this same
chain letter. She had a crush on the same kid since kindergarden. when she got
this mail she didn't pay any attention to it. She just thought, no big deal. And
deleted it. The next day her dad got fired and her mom dies in a car crash. If
she would have sent the letter none of that would have happened and her mom
would be alive.



Second Example:

Try Freddie D. Now Freddie D. was your average nerd. Had glasses, was short and
chubby, was in gifted. All the signs of
your total dork. He also received this letter and sent it to 51
people in the hour. Now, like Barbra, he had a crush on a girl since 3rd grade.
The next day after sending the chain the girl confessed her love for him ever
since 3rd grade. Freddie D. finally had the courage to ask her out, and of
course, she had been waiting to yes to that for years. They grew up and
married each other to live happily forever.



Third Example:

Now if you couldn't relate to the others, this'll get ya hooked. Listen to this.
A kid named Jordan Johnson was just getting on AOL to check his mail. He was a
quiet kid, not that popular but not a geek either. he was just normal. He saw he
had mail from his friend. It was this exact letter. Now Jordan Johnsen was a
smart kid and he knew what could happen if he didnt pass it on. He simply pulled
a few friends from his buddy list and sent it along. The next day, about that
same time, he got a phone call. It said he had won the lottery!
then his dad came home and bought him a new bike! His mom bought him Nintendo64
and play station! His grandmother sent him a new computer, and his best friend
gave him tickets to the concert he wanted to go to, Kid Rock and Limp Bizkit!
Then he inherited a brand-new tv from his aunt! He was goin' wild! the next day
his secret crush asked him out, and they have been going out ever since.


Now, you heard the stories. I know which person i'd rather
be, but thats up to you. I wouldn't wanna end up like Barbra but thats only me.
We all want what we cant have but now's ur chance to go out withthat special
somebody ur waiting for. Take it or leave it. If you send this to-



1 person- you will lose all luck in ur love life..... forever!!!!!


10 people- your crush will say they like you as a friend...... ONLY!!!!!


15 people- your crush will say they like you


20 people- your crush will ask you out!


25 people- your crush will kiss you!!


30 people - Your crush will have sex with you


35 people or more- All of the above!!

--
a picture is worth 1,000 words 10,000 if it's in color

--
all i ever wanted wasto love and be loved in return...even just a little
"He who fights monsters should see to it that in the process, he does not become a monster. And when you look into the abyss, the abyss also looks into you."

--
Feelings are not supposed to be logical. Dangerous is the man who has rationalized his emotions.
Thanks for the fave sweetie.

--
Bleating and babbling I fell on his neck with a scream. Wave upon wave of demented avengers march cheerfully out of obscurity into the dream.
Thanks for the favorite. :D
thanks for the fave! haha i just put it up a few minutes ago too!

--
A Cynical little Bastard and a Sarcastic Bitch
.....___ ___
.../......\/......\
.<.......O.......>
....\_______/

YOU HAVE BEEN KISSED!!!
Spread the lovin' around!

RULES:
1. Kiss anyone and everyone.
2. You can't kiss a person more than once.
3. You MUST kiss atleast one other pseron.
4. Random kisses are okay!
5. Yes, this was based off the DA hug.

--
98% of the teenage population does or has tried smoking pot. If you're one of the 2% who hasn't, copy & paste this in your signature.
Thank U for the :+fav:
Came anytime, i´ll keep on eye in your works :aww:


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/Serás sempre parte de mim, reflexo espelhado no meu coração*
thanks a lot for the fav!!!!

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